you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Today would have been my 8th wedding anniversary and I woke up with a hot European guy in my bed. Divorce has it's perks.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Randomize
