I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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