Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
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