Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I'm drive I can fine osifer
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
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