She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
