So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
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