Dual....:-)
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
There's always time for handjobs
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
