how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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