Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Randomize
