For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
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