I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I'm pretty sure ignoring the person that just sent you a picture of their boobs is bad nude etiquette.
Randomize
