my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
