If i come over, it means nothing
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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