just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
