I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Go christen that room with your naked body.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
