Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
