is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
