so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Randomize