Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
jump out the window naked night went bad
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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