so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
