something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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