Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
He came on me while singing crank dat like soulja boy, fuck our sex life has reached a whole new level of low
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
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