i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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