whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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