apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
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