let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
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