You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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