I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
