I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
