According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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