I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
I would throw a dart into the Olympic ceremony and fuck whoever it hit
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
