One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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