I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Randomize
