you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
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