At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
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