The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
