is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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