No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Pooping to opera.
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