Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
