Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
