you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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