genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Randomize
