Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
