i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
