do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
