Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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