think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
