I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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