He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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