Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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