he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
